They are ALL coming home!

by Barbara Rainey

I'm not a much of a realist.  When I was looking forward to having children I imagined them happy and loving me and each other.  Oh sure, there would be squabbles and sicknesses to temporarily mar the image I created, but it would always be temporary and nothing I couldn't handle.  Then I had kids.  At times it felt like they squabbled more than they got along and with six of them our sicknesses were multiplied.  I'm remembering the summer we had chicken pox.  It lasted six full weeks as first one contracted it, then two more, then the last two.  The youngest hadn't been born yet.  I felt imprisoned.  Insignificant.  Lonely.

You would think I would have become a realist from the hard knocks learned in parenting.

But hope springs eternal, so I imagined a new season for my family: everyone grown and mature and genuinely enjoying one another as adults.  But I forgot about them having children and I totally underestimated how many they'd have.  And I didn't think about the obvious—that they'd all parent their kids differently, that the spouses would need time to adjust to our family, and that everyone, including us parents, would still have an old sin nature.

Which brings me to the present tense.  Honestly I did not think this would ever happen again, but all my children and their spouses and kids are coming home for Thanksgiving!  I had resigned myself to not ever having them all again at one time, knowing that our house is too small to house that many humans at one time.  Comfortably, that is. And they value comfort.  My initial response was mild panic.  Now I'm excited about the potential.  If I can just think through everyone's needs ahead of time.  Is my idealism re-surfacing?

When Thanksgiving was still a month away I began my planning.  Who would sleep where?  What would we all eat?  How much could I cook ahead?  How much should I child-proof my house? 

Actually I've answered that last one.  I learned the hard way that my children really don't care if my house is cute when they come to visit. So, I will thoroughly remove anything breakable or valuable for the week.  When my kids arrive they bring an enormous trail of necessities for the 13 little ones.  Bottles of apple juice, baby food, play things, blankets, diaper bags, pack 'n plays, and more than I can remember at the moment.  That's not counting all the suitcases and pillows plus sleeping bags for the older kids.

Last night at dinner my husband and I talked about what we could do that would be fun with the older grandkids so he and I aren't relegated to merely cooking and cleaning up messes and serving all week. Sounds terribly selfish, but it's the truth.  I want to have fun and enjoy every minute.

A new adventure is on the horizon for me:  welcoming 24 people to my four-bedroom house for various lengths of stay.  I will learn more about patience and grace and I hope we make wonderful memories together in this new season of our family.  And I'm going to try to learn from my dose of realism at last year's Thanksgiving celebration and work on lowering my expectations a bit, expecting some crises or messes or disappointed children of any age. 

I'll add updates as the planning progresses!

Comments

[Sue L.]

Oh my, I must admit my own blood pressure rose with reading about all of your family coming home for Thanksgiving. I can easily get caught up in the preparations of making a gathering work with menus and sleeping arrangements, etc. But then I exhaled and thought of the absolute blessing it is to have everyone that you love and care about under your roof. Bringing your family together and sharing a meal together around the table (or maybe several tables?!) will bless the Rainey family so much. Be sure to take lots of family pictures to treasure for years to come. God Bless!

[Hannah]

This is what I look forward to on days like this when I cannot peel three of our six sick kids off of me and simply getting a load of laundry in feels like a major event to celebrate!
Enjoy your Thanksgiving, I am sure it will be lovely and memorable for everyone.
Blessings,
Hannah

[Maryd]

A wonderful dose of "perspective." Thank you, Barbara.